Rocky Racoon
by momerathes outgrabe
Summary: Cowboy Bebop plus The Beatles equals...uhh...see inside. DONE.


**Title:** Rocky Raccoon

**Rating:** K+ (to be safe)

**Blah:** Just something random. This song was playing when I was kind of dozing off during the seven hour car ride and for some reason Rocky reminded me of Spike. I don't know. Though he's VERY malicious in this kind of. But yet, I wrote this in a couple hours when I got home. Like literally. I think it took me two hours to write this…interesting…piece of crap XD Anyway, comment if you must.

**Warnings:** Cursing, SOME violence, AU, OOC to fit in with the song.

**ETC:** Don't own Cowboy Bebop or the song. Kthx.

_**

* * *

Now somewhere in the black mountain hills of Dakota  
There lived a young boy named Rocky Raccoon  
And one day his woman ran off with another guy  
Hit young Rocky in the eye, rocky didn't like that  
He said, "I'm gonna' get that boy."  
So one day he walked into town  
Booked himself a room in the local saloon**_

Spike Spiegel was a very mellow fellow - that is if you didn't fuck with him. He made sure that he had a strong reputation as a badass, and if so much as one hair on his head was pissed off at your being, you would be in for a ride. Being a badass, he kept everything in his life in check, including his woman. He was actually very protective of her, there were rumors around town that he had killed a man for smiling at her. So imagine his surprise when she left him.

It happened fast. He got home from you know, his job, to see the tall blonde bent over a suitcase packing. She was obviously in a hurry. Her hair was tangled and still a bit wet from what he guess was an afternoon shower, and she was wearing her laundry day clothes. Not very flattering. "Julia?" he spoke, confused.

She spun around and looked at him. "Spike," she breathed, smiling charmingly. She clasped the suitcase shut. "My…uh…Mother is…ill…" She was a bad liar.

Spike fingered the cigarette in his mouth and raised an eyebrow. "Where are you going?" His voice was demanding.

Julia pushed her hair from her face and glared. "None of your business if you MUST know," she finally said shortly, dragging the suitcase off the bed and across the room. "But I'm leaving."

He grabbed her arm, but she pulled away and roughly slapped his face.

"Don't ever look at me again Spike Spiegel!" she said angrily as she stormed out of the small house.

Needless to say, he was pissed. Not only did he know EXACTLY who the little slut was running off with, but he realized that she was wearing his favorite t-shirt when he left. Cursing under his breath, he pulled out his gun and loaded it. If she thought leaving him for a bastard like Vicious was going to be THAT easy…

_**Rocky Raccoon checked into his room  
Only to find Gideon's bible  
Rocky had come equipped with a gun  
To shoot off the legs of his rival  
His rival it seems had broken his dreams  
By stealing the girl of his fancy  
Her name was Magil and she called herself Lil  
But everyone knew her as Nancy**_

The room was shitty and small, but those were the least of Spike's worries. He had found the exact place that Julia had run off to, with help from a friendly gas station manager of course. So almost immediately, the cowboy checked into a room to take care of this delicate…Situation. He knew that just because he showed up to kill Vicious multiple times fold, Julia wasn't going to be impressed. So of course, he bought flowers. Twelve roses. He smirked at his own genius.

He threw his duffle on the bed and then dropped the bundle of flowers next to it. He tried not to resort to violence, but alas, people repeatedly proved to be idiots. What else was he to do. This Vicious character had always eyed Julia, but he had never done anything about it yet in fear that Julia might leave him. She always loved animals, and that Vicious had a bird. An ugly bird, but she didn't even seem to notice. Well now that she was gone, it didn't matter.

He let out a sigh and pulled out a picture from his back pocket. It wasn't a very good picture, but it was from his first date with Julia and it held a certain sentimental value. He set it on the table and noticed a thick book beside the lamp. "Bible?" he said picking it up. He flipped open the cover. In a messy scrawl it said "This bible belongs to Faye Valentine." Spike's brow wrinkled and he tossed it aside. That stupid hussy was NOT the religious type so why did she own a bible?

Shrugging, he grabbed his gun to take care of business.

_**Now she and her man who called himself Dan  
Were in the next room at the hoe down  
Rocky burst in and grinning a grin  
He said, "Danny boy this is a showdown."  
But Daniel was hot - he drew first and shot  
And Rocky collapsed in the corner**_

As he touched the doorknob leaving his room, he heard a giggle and a voice that he recognized. Was it his luck that they were right in the room next door? He left his room and stalked one door over to listen. He heard voices and laughter…Julia's laughter. That was a sound he would be able to notice anywhere. He kicked open the door, and the two looked up at him shocked. A malicious grin was painted across his lips.

"Spike!" Julia cried, a mixture of fear and anger in her voice. "What are you DOING?"

He ignored her and stared at Vicious, who had his hand on Julia's. "This is it for you, my friend," he cooed raising his gun. "I'll give you five seconds to get your gun. I dare you to move."

But before he got to one, Vicious drew his own weapon and without so much of a change in expression, fired.

Julia screamed, that's all Spike remembered.

_**Now the doctor came in stinking of gin  
And proceeded to lie on the table  
He said, "Rocky you met your match."  
And Rocky said, "Doc it's only a scratch  
And I'll be better, I'll be better doc as soon as I am able."**_

He awoke to the smell of booze.

And then a rough hand slapping him across the face.

Quickly, Spike sat up and waited for his vision to return to normal. Sitting next to him was an old friend, a face it took not a second to recognize. "Jet," he said coolly, smiling…But only slightly. He propped his wiry frame against the bedpost and examined the wound on his shoulder. "Well this is great."

Jet shook his head and handed a box of cigarettes to him. "You've met your match, Spike," was all he said, providing a flame once the cigarette was in between Spike's lips. "Just give her up."

Spike shrugged and puffed away, deep in thought. He supposed he could give up, but then what? People wouldn't respect him. His shoulder throbbed as he shifted his weight to remove the cigarette from his lips. "It's just a scratch," he finally answered. "Nothing I can't handle. And once I'm better, that little wanker better…"

"Spike," Jet interrupted coldly. "They left. Did you expect her to stay?"

He frowned and took another hit. "Well THAT'S a problem," he muttered to himself. He wasn't really listening to Jet speak, instead he was plotting the perfect way to get back at both Vicious and Julia. Fuck the girl, he didn't want her anymore. But he wanted her to know what happens when you mess with Spike Spiegel.

Jet continued. "Anyway, Julia called me so I came. But you seem to be just as stubborn with or without my help," he said, rising. He turned to leave. "Oh yea, Faye told me to tell you that you deserved it." He smiled. "I can't say that I don't agree."

Spike's eyes narrowed as he watched the large man leave.

_**Now Rocky Raccoon he fell back in his room  
Only to find Gideon's bible  
Gideon checked out and he left it no doubt  
To help with good Rocky's revival**_

When he was gone Spike leaned over to pick up Faye's bible. It fell open to a random page and he began to read, waiting for his wound to heal. (so you know, he could stalk Vicious and Julia etc. etc.)


End file.
